It was almost bliss, those past few weeks before the first month of the year had reached its penultimate climax. And then time lurched us back to reality..of putting on hold what we started oh so intensely.
We almost ended it..in fact, yes, I had ended it months back.. or so I thought..
but our connection it seems does not recognize such a word as goodbye..for how many times have we bid each other adieu? often to wind up together when time and schedule permit. always picking up from where we left of..
Somehow we have been inured to the pain of breaking away from the tight embrace, only to succumb to the longing when the occasion to meet calls..
It gets tiring at times, we're like a yo-yo spinning madly, away, then back up again to the hands that hold us close.. swinging here and there yet always wounding our way back, fast and firmly held by the strong grip in a tight knot.
I often pride myself to be a veteran of goodbyes, yet I can never get used to the constant farewells - the let's keep in touch, see you sometime soon again scene's. Scenes that we often played up to the last minute. And why we must always part after those intense moments is beyond me but I guess that is part of the attraction of whatever it is that we have..That I get the feeling we wouldn't want it any other way..that it would destroy the magic we share if we have a 'normal' thing like others have - of constant togetherness, washing the dishes together, or the taking out of garbage.. maybe it's not our thing.. this union is never like that and never will be like that.
But still we have love- the connection, whatever.. and that whenever we are together the heaven is just a breath away..then we head back to our routines. Yes, it may just be our own kind of heaven - almost..but not quite. .
