CHANGES & CHANCES

A lot of changes..yes, we are often faced with it. In our daily lives but more so now when thinking about certain situations in my life now. We just had to deal with it not because it is inevitable but because we just have to. And most of the time, there are no reasons or hidden meanings, we just have to pass through it.

But more than these changes that we know are likely to happen anyway and one we could not dictate or demand to not happen, somehow there is a change we need to make to survive.  And that is to change our attitude. Our perception about change bears changing.  While not exactly welcoming each change that comes our way with open arms, we should change how we react to it and in so doing open up ourselves to better chances.

It's all about how we handle the change, how we manage to remain calm, poised while being alert to opportunities at the same time.  For any change we should try to offset with all the chances. Chances we need to take so that whatever is no longer the same would somehow still continue to feel the same. Change should not chain us but charge us into making a brighter tomorrow.

Changes - only exceptional people go through it much stronger, though not exactly unscathed, still are much better off than when things stayed the same..

Whispers from the heart

in the silence - the only echo one hears is the beating of the heart.. pining for that memory and knowing that it cannot be retrieved or replayed now just craving for the future that brings more of that bliss..

the angst of an unspoken word from a sullen lover is easily felt despite its incessant throbbing..it knows when it's troubled or at least feel the hurt and the pain of its counterpart..

now needing to reach out through all that distance, to clear the cobwebs of doubt and try to heal the wounded one so that they can again bond together, unaffected by time, distance or circumstances..

in continuing to do so it whispers only what the other can hear ..whispering a love that both hold dear

Sudden - Saddened

It is always sad to lose a person you love through an accident.  The sudden loss that leaves you feeling cold & angry at the same time..where the only consolation is in the knowledge that the one you lost left a good impression among the people left behind, in the awareness that your loved one has touched many lives 

even strangers who come up to you to relay their condolences. Somehow you're warmed by the fact that the person you lost has actually lived a full life, of love & generosity.  

For that is the how I felt when my mom died of an accident several years back.  There was no describing the pall of gloom that descended in our household upon realization that she is gone forever, no longer would  we witness her smile that often comforts us, the support and faith she has for us even when we ourselves are falling short of our own expectations, the love and care, and the leadership she has shown managing a one-parent family (after my father died of a heart attack years prior to her death, she was left all alone to take care of us).

Knowing that there is no one to replace and  fill in that void she left is enough to make us undergo a transformation not exactly of our own choosing..painful is not even enough to express how it felt.

And now, looking at the current events, watching a stranger but a very public figure also meet an untimely death, one can only emphatize & symphatize with the family & the bereaved daughters and wife. But it also reminds us that when goodness has become a way of life, the passing will not come as a mere whimper or a dot on the radar that fades unnoticed.  That when a person led a life that's dedicated to serving others, of offering a love and generous spirit, that warmth, that love extends far beyond the immediate family.  

Still, however comforting &heart-warming those love from others are directed towards those who lost the only light in their lives, that is but a mere alternative, just a token substitute for the dearly departed. For the one we lost could never be replaced. A sudden death by accident ultimately leaves us all saddened..

and that we just have deal with in our own unique way..

Agog about Gaga

I just felt the need to say my piece on this.  It seems there are certain groups that may be a bit overreacting or possibly doing it the wrong way.  This is about the protest to ban the concert of Lady Gaga in Manila this May 21 to 22.

I mean, why all the fuss? Why only now? And why do these groups suddenly picked on her song and music videos that has been going around for more than three years and dissected its contents, the symbols and all then  picket themselves near the concert venue to ask the organizers to stop the concert.

While the right to assemble for a cause is okay, what I am at odds with is their reasoning about the so-called diabolic messages of Lady Gaga's songs and even branding her as the 'devil's messenger' for her music videos and for the symbols appearing on her concerts & the way she dresses. 

I feel it is just an artistic expression on Lady Gaga's part and if her songs contain subtle insinuations of some other divination that is a direct departure from the holy & Christian way, it is her music and it's not as if she is shoving it down the throats of those who don't care to listen.  She is just here to perform, to entertain the fans and why not leave it at that? It's not as if she will cause mass hypnosis urging children to kill, to abort or go forth in evil ways.  Nothing of the sort but that is what these groups of holier-than-thou activists are making it appear to be.

And now they gave the kids all the more reason to dissect the lyrics whereas before they were just after the beat and the entertaining chorus.  So who's really making a mockery of God in this instance? Why call attention to that very thing which they so want the youth to deviate from?  The young are forever curious and the more taboo it seems, the more interesting it gets and these protests only made it more interesting.  I bet even non-Lady Gaga fans have started to make an about-face too and will try to listen to her songs and that only pushed her all the more into the mainstream of everybody's consciousness.

They should have just let the fans grow tired of Lady Gaga's music if that is just a passing fancy & it's not as if one woman's music would sway the people to act a certain way if there are other outside influences that can be more powerful - like a positive event, or a person whom they can relate to aside from a Gothic impressionist but very entertaining artist. 

Just leave well enough alone. Let art take care of itself & let the true and holy prevail without us having to raise those  fists & shout in barbaric ways showcasing our ignorance of reality and the lack of true faith.

Mindset all set

don't read so much into the sweetness of others nor suddenly get turned off when things are a little less saccharine than you expect. 

a matter of perceiving what is and what is not -  but how to react when things get a little bit quirky or somehow more than meets the eye. But then how does one really know that it is more than what one sees?

Again, perceptions and mindset once it's all set can be a source of either joy or disappointment.

Quirky Tagalog words

Who would've thought that something admirable or probably respectful in a sense could sometimes (no, make that often) come across as an insult or some sort of discrimination or age classification (i.e. turning out judgmental)?

I'm talking about some Filipinos' penchant for the proverbial 'po, opo, ho, sa inyo (in addressing an apparently more senior person) which while supposedly intended to respect the person being addressed is sometimes indicative of a preconceived notion about others.  In other words, some form of unintentional slur (not unlike gender or racial discrimination).

Case in point - there are some 'well-meaning' folks who perennially address others with 'po' or 'opo' as if it was written on the forehead of the person being referred to that he/she is older by more than a decade to that person who is talking.  What is quite fascinating and at the same time insulting about this is when you look at the person speaking, he/she looks in fact much older than the one being addressed with a 'po' or 'opo'.

I'm not totally against such respectful address and it is quite prevalent especially among social classes when let's say a housemaid or a driver or someone belonging to a lower class that even if they are considerably older they address their 'señoritas' or young masters or mistresses or the boss with the ubiquitous 'po' or 'oho'. That is more a sign of deference for someone above you.  I also don't like this particular practice as if you're demeaning yourself but it has become the norm.

But I'm talking about the different kind of speaking to somebody with that 'po' inserted into the conversation if there is no social class difference but just out of the mistaken notion of the one who is talking that he/she is much younger when in fact they look just the same age or even older.  That is what gets me.

I don't know about you but that is just my thing.  Now, at my age now I wouldn't mind being addressed as such IF (yes, that's a big if alright) the person addressing me is in his/her teens or probably the age of my nephews or nieces. That is generally expected. But I don't hide the fact that I get a little offended and tend to give the person a once-over if I was addressed with a 'po' by someone who appears and indeed is much older than me.  I mean, hey, do I look like your aunt or mother? Just saying!  I can tolerate that kind of address if I know I'm at least 10 years his/her senior but give or take a year or 5 yrs or so difference, that is not an excuse to just willfully and mindlessly blurt out the 'po, opo, sa inyo, kayo' artillery to someone.  Get my drift?

See, the thing is while we complain about discrimination over gender, social class, race, etc some of us are judgmental in the sense that we are also discriminatory (consciously or unconsciously) when it comes to age. It's like a subtle way of putting yourself on the pedestal of 'youthful' appearance vs the one being addressed. Like categorically saying that the other person looks older while you look like in your teens.  I for one do not     make it a habit to talk to someone with a po or opo even if they are older by up to 10 years than me. Not mean to be disrespectful but in fact it's just my way of telling the other person that we're equal. That I am neither being irreverent nor am I trying to demean myself (as opposed to someone who says po or opo to someone belonging to a higher social status).

The Tagalog language it seems is kind of quirky in this sense by adding po or opo in a conversation which may signify reverence but on the downside can be perceived as a slight slur on someone's appearance or age for that matter.

So I hope that some people will realize that such words when added into the conversation doesn't hint on anybody's superiority or inferiority or seniority.  At times, it can just be simply annoying so lay down a bit on that. okay 'po' ba??

Lend your Spirit to Lent

With the long break in observance of Lent here in the Philippines, it is always a good time to look back on the first few months of the year and see how far you've come towards your goals. Or how far you still need to go.. a moment of recollection but more a time for renewal.  It also makes you think of what is more important - - to go on that swimming expedition, a visit to the local church, read the Bible, ponder on life's possibilities or simply just chill & relax tired & weary bones, muscles and brain.

It is vital however to think in terms of how you are going to use that extended weekend to appreciate the blessings you have been given and to refresh the mind on what the occasion is really all about - - a reconnection to your spirituality, the faith and gratitude to the One Supreme Being for whom we commemorate this holy week.  Think of the Passion of Christ and forego your own simplistic & sometimes selfish passions towards earthly endeavors..just for a brief period.

Hearts connected

you can feel the smile almost imagine it as the subtle crackle of wireless connection whizzes by.. such tender moments that can never be described but can only be remembered by the emotions from deep inside. And the yearning sometimes tacitly expressed, at times hidden through other words especially when within hearing distance of people around..still always felt nonetheless.

Those conversations that no one else hears, shared only between hearts connected to each other, bound together even from a distance..

Oh, those Cravings

Often faced with the perennial question - - to give in or defy one's cravings.  It usually hits during those awkward moments or at an ungodly hour.  Like if you're craving for some Korean chicken with some kimchi how does one address that at close to midnight, when it's storming outside even (get the drift)?

Other times we crave for that warm embrace, the touch from someone but it just wouldn't do because situation does not permit us (in a long-distance relationship).  Yes, those miles can still be a problem despite the technology.

Or how about the longing to travel the world but just couldn't wean yourself away from work issues making it next to impossible to really leave the country or the town for days? 

Such cravings - not submitting to it even if we want to. Not by choice but just by circumstances. But soon all that will be addressed.

It does matter to De-Clutter

the key is not being stuck in the status quo.  Always find a way out of any rut you may be in, whether imagined or actual.  There is always a need to step up, to de-clutter our minds from what's limiting it the past months. This is as good a time as any to start..Brand new, take some of the old skills but leave the old attitudes and mindset behind.

What is vital is to discover new things of doing old things..always be on the lookout for a better way of performing anything, even if it's as mundane as crossing a street, surely, there is a route that is better than where you usually trod.

And foremost is let go of the things that clutter the mind, resolve to make things easier from this moment on and program your mind, body, emotions to reset - - towards a brighter tomorrow.