Saturday, June 26, 2010

L Torio's Theory (on love & life)

My friends and I sometimes find ourselves discussing some random things about life, love and relationships during one of those nights outs.

And there are certain points which I raised with them, just a few of my random theories that I am now posting here to let a few people in on our conversations.

Theory #1: We cannot expect our man or woman to love as we do. -I am a firm believer of not expecting the same amount or degree of love and affection from others as you would from yourself. I mean we are all different beings. We think differently, have separate priorities, with distinct backgrounds and temperaments. It's just not the same for the simple reason that we are not the same.

Theory #2: On certain occasions, our affection wanes and waxes. - There will be instances in the relationship when our lovers are more affectionate toward us while on the next day, it would be our turn to be more caring. Sometimes, how we relate to our lovers/beloved depends on our moods and with what's going on in our lives and minds at that time. But that doesn't mean we love each other any less. And yes, this also explains why there are some moments when I would prefer spending time with friends more than I would with him though I would pretend I am already sleeping at home in case he calls.

Theory#3: Others can only love at a certain level or Some have Limited Capacity for love than most. - When a usually aloof and rather distant lover would suddenly turn more affectionate on one given moment and does some unexpected gesture, we often fail to notice it. Most of the time we fail to realize that the lover is actually already making a super human effort to connect and make the relationship better especially when that person is not hard-wired for romance growing up with the mindset that emotions are only up to a limited level. It is easy for someone who is normally affectionate, romantic and expressive to overlook the fact that someone is after all making a grand enough move to show how much he cares. All because of our wayward idea that lovers in a relationship are supposed to act a certain way, to be romantic, etc. Whereas 'supposed to' become the operative words here.

There must be a way to help us distinguish when our man/woman is raising the bar on their role in the relationship and giving in to their more romantic side. I mean that has to be encouraged by not allowing ourselves to trivialize the gesture. At least show how much we appreciate them and learn to bite our tongues when we feel like criticizing. This is especially true for some ladies when a man gives her a gift that is way off her idea of a truly romantic gift. A lot of men suck at gift-giving anyway so we should not be too hard on them. Women most especially need to get that radar on when their men are doing something out of the 'ordinary' and not continue on bashing them just because they don't happen to fit into the suave, romantic leading man stereotype that she craves. What this theory boils down to is that some people can only reach up to a certain level of loving whereas some of the lucky ones can experience and feel love at a totally higher level and even in higher dosages.

While my friends and I do not often agree on some of these theories I mentioned, somehow it made our get-together a bit interesting and I haven't even started to include our conversations involving (gasp!) orgasms, the capacity for people to actually love more than one person at a time, the case for and against marriage, etc. but that would be part of future posts.

Until then, my theories remain theories..

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

OMG

this phrase running around my head lately (partly helped by Usher and the song I've been LSS'ing with the past days). At once it is an expression of my amusement and happiness combined with that feeling of exasperation or someone who may just be a bit overwhelmed by a lot of goings-on in my life.

Pretty much sums up how this month, my month is going so far. As in OMG! can't believe that someone is being super sensitive in a pleasurable, exciting way. WHo would have thought that some simple things actually do mean a lot to him?

And then, OMG! i never thought i would get the hang of excel spreadsheets but yes, those sheets are my allies during this time of the year (read: 2010 1st half audit). used to be loyal to just MS word and its cousin notepad but now, those spreadsheets are looking kind of sexy.

Also, OMG! in just a few days' time, we would be having a new Philippine government. see how that will pan out in its first few days. exciting to see how the remaining half of the year will turn out. Always will pray and hope for the best.

OMG! i'm running a bit of space now and soon i just might post my version of haiku /meme/rants (of course i do that often on facebook and twitter anyway) but who knows, someday those little bit of emo-posts might just get published or even run as an app on your favorite e-reader.

OMG! It's rather late and must try to grab that elusive sleep now. goodnight.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

No Way to the NaySayers!

I find it slightly annoying the way some people try to live their lives whining at how they are getting all the scraps, lamenting their lots in life. I mean to go griping almost everyday and in the process trying to grate on others people's nerves. My best approach when encountering these types of people is to just act nonchalant, not let myself be affected by their incessant and negative talks and to try real hard not to let that attitude contaminate my thoughts. It's a bit okay if the whining is restricted to what they perceive as being at the raw end of life but to actually take it against the people whom they feel are getting the better deal compared to them - now that is quite unforgivable if you ask me. It's like blaming somebody else for your poor attitude. What they should do is to just try to find what that supposedly 'lucky' person is doing right to deserve the good things in life and not be bitter towards that person. It's not as if the 'lucky' guy or girl has stepped on them or intentionally did something to relegate them into their lowly conditions. What they must realize is that the supposedly lucky person is just in an altogether different mindset, adapting an attitude that is so opposite to what they, the naysayers are used to. That the lucky person is after all also experiencing difficulties, probably having much bigger problems than what the 'whiners' club members' are going through but just reacting a lot better by embracing the good opportunities and pleasant moments in life. So the next time you catch yourself turning into a 'whiny' full of grouse person do not turn against somebody whom you thought are having all the luck and instead try to look around the beauty of the world. Lighten up, have fun and just SMILE so you won't have to worry about having a misspent existence.